Perhaps it’s not the worst simile…

…but when Willard Sterne Randall reports that “The resulting stalemate was about to burst like a beaver dam in a spring freshet, sweeping away the French”, I think I strained a muscle rolling my eyes.  

Yes, at this point (about which I’ll post later), the situation of the French teamed with the Algonquins (the Native Americans, not Dorothy Parker’s pals) against the English and the Iroquois was, indeed, a powder keg.  But Randall’s cutesie phrasing is especially appalling given that a dozen pages later, he practically writes a series of action adventure scenes suitable for Washington & Christopher Gist to be played by Johnny Depp and Daniel Craig.

And please don’t write in to point out that Depp is too old and too short and too weird to play a 21-year-old Washington. I don’t watch action movies and at least both of these guys could believably manage running off, getting their canoe cracked against ice shards, avoiding getting shot and living to heroically delivery the intel.  You wanna complain about casting, get your own blog. <g>

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Published in: on January 3, 2009 at 7:12 pm  Leave a Comment  
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